How to choose your psychotherapist?
Finding Your Way to Therapy: A Journey We Take Together
Beginning therapy is one of the most courageous steps we can take as human beings. The very act of reaching out acknowledges our shared vulnerability and our innate desire to be understood in our struggles. Perhaps the most profound challenge in this journey is not simply deciding to seek help, but rather finding someone with whom you can explore the deeper questions of your existence.
How does one choose a person to witness their deepest uncertainties, their most vulnerable moments? I offer these reflections not as definitive answers, but as gentle guideposts for a path we must each walk in our own way.
Start with directories
There are several professional directories where therapists make themselves known to the world. Some popular examples are the BACP Directory, the Counselling Directory, the UKCP Directory, and the SEA Directory. These serve as starting points in our search. I would suggest considering therapists within your geographical area, even if you plan to meet online. Sometimes, in the course of our work together, meeting in person becomes meaningful.
Search with location, symptoms, and look for registrations and accreditations
When using these directories, you can search by location and the particular concerns that weigh upon you. Look for professional registrations and accreditations in your search results. BACP and UKCP are the main bodies that recognise psychotherapists, and members of these organisations are bound by their ethical standards. Yet remember, these credentials, while important, are frameworks. What matters most is the quality of human connection that can unfold between you and your potential therapist.
Have multiple options and contact them
I encourage you to create a shortlist of several therapists whose words or approach resonate with something within you. This is not a reflection of indecision, but rather a recognition that we cannot predict where genuine connection might emerge. Some therapists may not have availability, others may work at times that don’t align with your life’s rhythms.
Reach out to those who speak to you in some way. Many therapists offer brief introductory conversations where you can get a sense of whether or not there might be potential for meaningful work together. If such calls aren’t offered, consider booking an initial session as an exploration rather than a commitment. This first meeting is as much about you discovering them as it is about them meeting you.
Trust your gut
In these initial encounters, pay attention to what emerges within you. Do you feel a sense of safety? Can you imagine being authentically yourself with this person? The foundation of meaningful therapeutic work is based on trust and genuine human connection. This will influence how deeply the work can unfold.
Don’t be afraid to change your mind
If, after several sessions, you find that the therapeutic relationship isn’t giving you what you seek, this is valuable information. Bringing such concerns into the therapeutic space itself can sometimes transform the work in unexpected ways. A skilled therapist will be able to explore these feelings with you rather than avoiding them.
Should you ultimately decide that this particular therapeutic relationship isn’t serving your journey, this is absolutely fine. Sometimes we must encounter what doesn’t fit to discover what does.
Your choice of therapist is ultimately a choice about how you want to explore what it means to be you, in this world, at this particular moment in time. Trust yourself in this process, and remember that seeking understanding and connection is one of the most fundamentally human things we can do.
